I was going to add paragraph breaks and punctuation, but instead decided to give you this Facebook status update written exactly how the author intended. Transcription: Ok Facebook I’m saying a lot of things going on about the Confederate flag. I’m going to be the first one to tell you that

I admit, I don’t watch many wedding videos, none actually. But I stumbled upon this pathetic white trash Juggalo wedding video and couldn’t take my eyes off it. You’ll hear Insane Clown Posse playing in the backdrop. You’ll see the couple married in about 60 seconds by a fat man in Juggalo face

I’m sure her inbox was flooded with inquiries. Ad reads: USED LACEY PANTIE THONGS Recently had a lap band and can no longer fit into them, only worn about 12 times each. My washermachine is currently broken so I suggest you rewash them if buying to be safe. I’m asking

DAYTONA BEACH, Fla. – A Daytona Beach man, Ronald Lynn, 52, was arrested Tuesday morning telling police he had an “addiction to liking kids.” Lynn admitted he had downloaded child pornography on many occasions and shared photos and videos with other pedophiles on peer-to-peer file sharing programs. Police seized computers, DVDs,

A private school principal in Pennsylvania is facing charges for allegedly groping and hugging a male student in the school’s bathroom. NBC-10 reports that George James Symonds, 62, principal of the Concept School in Chester County, faces charges of corruption of minors, endangering the welfare of children and two counts

Lots of Darwin awards being handed out this past week. We have our second reported death by fireworks incident. Police say a Texas mailman died this week after lighting a firework on his chest while partying with friends. Justin Bartek, 30, from Columbus, Texas and some friends were shooting off

Two Asian black bears mistakenly thought to be “pet dogs” by a local villager for two years in Yunnan Province have been sent to the provincial wildlife rescue center. Wang Kaiyu, a villager in Maguan County, told ChinaNews that he believed the bears were dogs while buying them. He added

By Kelly Broich Originally published as satire on Moron.com in 2015 Republished here to reflect original authorship and public record JACKSONVILLE, Florida – Jeff Waters walked into a Bank of America Monday morning and attempted to cash a check for $368,000,000,000 dollars. The check Waters had written to ‘Cash’ was

CHICAGO – Chicago police were called to a home after a 911 call to find a woman hitting herself in the head with a crowbar. When two officers tried to calm Jenny Peak, 33, she dropped the crowbar and started running her head into a living room wall. Peak then

AUGUSTA, Georgia — A Georgia woman, Tabithia Lee Grooms, 35, attacked her live-in boyfriend and her 66-year-old mother after her boyfriend refused to have sex with her earlier in the day, a Richmond County Sheriff’s report said. Upset over getting no action, Grooms went out drinking and when she came