I was going to add paragraph breaks and punctuation, but instead decided to give you this Facebook status update written exactly how the author intended. Transcription: Ok Facebook I’m saying a lot of things going on about the Confederate flag. I’m going to be the first one to tell you that

I admit, I don’t watch many wedding videos, none actually. But I stumbled upon this pathetic white trash Juggalo wedding video and couldn’t take my eyes off it. You’ll hear Insane Clown Posse playing in the backdrop. You’ll see the couple married in about 60 seconds by a fat man in Juggalo face

James McElvar, 19, of Rewind fell ill after attempting to avoid a $70 luggage charge by wearing all of this clothes on an EasyJet flight. The singer of the boyband collapsed on the plane due to heat exhaustion. McLever, who wore 12 layers of clothing, told The Sun, “I thought

MADISON — Brian Dutcher, who was arrested by the Secret Service for making written and verbal threats to kill President Barack Obama during his visit to La Crosse last week, planned to carry out the assassination with slingshot, a federal agent testified Thursday at a court hearing. Dutcher, 55, of

Lots of Darwin awards being handed out this past week. We have our second reported death by fireworks incident. Police say a Texas mailman died this week after lighting a firework on his chest while partying with friends. Justin Bartek, 30, from Columbus, Texas and some friends were shooting off

Two Asian black bears mistakenly thought to be “pet dogs” by a local villager for two years in Yunnan Province have been sent to the provincial wildlife rescue center. Wang Kaiyu, a villager in Maguan County, told ChinaNews that he believed the bears were dogs while buying them. He added

By Kelly Broich Originally published as satire on Moron.com in 2015 Republished here to reflect original authorship and public record JACKSONVILLE, Florida – Jeff Waters walked into a Bank of America Monday morning and attempted to cash a check for $368,000,000,000 dollars. The check Waters had written to ‘Cash’ was

CHICAGO – Chicago police were called to a home after a 911 call to find a woman hitting herself in the head with a crowbar. When two officers tried to calm Jenny Peak, 33, she dropped the crowbar and started running her head into a living room wall. Peak then

AUGUSTA, Georgia — A Georgia woman, Tabithia Lee Grooms, 35, attacked her live-in boyfriend and her 66-year-old mother after her boyfriend refused to have sex with her earlier in the day, a Richmond County Sheriff’s report said. Upset over getting no action, Grooms went out drinking and when she came

Like eating a lot? Hate dieting? Exercise a bother? Now you can pound those 20 Big Macs worry-free thanks to the AspireAssist®. This device literally sucks the food from your stomach before the food is processed into calories. Here’s how it works: You have a permanent hole cut into your