Search Result for “officer”
Florida Man hit on 911 dispatcher, told her about his big muscles
FLORIDA – Florida Man, Eduardo Raoul Garcia, 44, was camping in a Florida park when he dialed 911 to report a harassing call he had received, a police report said. The 911 operator said Garcia alleged he had been been receiving harassing phone calls from “a homosexual” who wanted to
Video shows Florida Man dancing on patrol car to save children from vampires
LEE COUNTY, Fla. — A Florida Man, 44, was arrested after he was busted on surveillance video bumping into the back of a patrol car and ‘boogie dancing’ on the SUV’s roof while Hall & Oates’ “Rich Girl” and Supertramp’s “Goodbye Stranger” blasted from his car. According to a police
Pennsylvania man ran fake DUI checkpoint while drunk
SOMERSET, Pa. — Okay, get this… a Pennsylvania man — who was drunk — set up a drunk-driving checkpoint complete with road flares and pretended he was a State patrolman named Officer Superman. State troopers say Logan Shaulis, 19, diagonally parked his Mazda Miata across state Route 601 and set up road flares about
Women wanted for stealing Walmart scooters, riding them down U.S. 30
GUILFORD TOWNSHIP — Pennsylvania State Police, Chambersburg, said officers responded at 12:08 a.m. to the 1700 block of LWE for a report that three women were speeding down U.S. 30 on Walmart scooters. Police chased the three women into the parking lot of a Super Shoes where the women abandoned the
Woman Arrested For Biting Off Pit Bull’s Testicles
MADISON, West Virginia – Witnesses told police this week that they pleaded with Boone county resident, Audrey Ranch, 62, to stop hurting her son’s pit bull, but she refused. “Eventually she bit Pedro’s acorns clean off right there in the front yard,” a witness said. “Pedro hightailed it screeching like
Florida Man Turns Himself In For Murdering Imaginary Friend
By Kelly Broich Originally published as satire on Moron.com in 2015 Republished here to reflect original authorship and public record JACKSONVILLE, Florida – Geoff Gaylord, 37, entered the Jacksonville Sheriff’s Office earlier today and turned himself in for killing his imaginary friend — Mr. Happy. Gaylord told officers he had
Man Kidnaps Woman As ‘Early Christmas Present’ To Himself
CLEVELAND, Ohio – Adam Moulson kidnapped an unidentified African-American woman this morning, but was quickly apprehended by police after he crashed his red Volkswagen Beetle into, ironically, another red Volkswagen Beetle while trying to get away. “He enticed the woman with a large candy cane,” an officer with Cleveland Police said. “Once the victim was near his window he threw
Woman Makes $10,000 A Month Asking “Boyfriends” For Abortion Money
Baton Rouge, Louisiana – A 27-year-old woman was pulled over early morning due to a speeding violation. When Natasha Brown acted in a very suspicious manner officers decided to search her vehicle where they discovered $60,000 in cash. When officers asked her why she had such a large amount of
Idaho Man Using Pet Tiger To Hunt Deer
IDAHO FALLS – Winter campers, Tom and Mellisa Elbert, received a shock when they saw a Siberian tiger chasing a deer through the woods in eastern Idaho. The young couple had snow-shoed into the Idaho side of the Teton Mountains and were sitting in their camp when the tiger ran by chasing the deer. The deer and
Homeless People Arrested For Building Homes
BUFFALO – Early Monday morning Buffalo police detained and released 72 homeless citizens for building an “apartment building” in a wooded area on the outskirts of the city. The structure in its current state of development would have housed 25 people. Full build-out, the “foreman” said, was expected to have housed 280. “The structure was a