Every day Facebook provides us with facepalming idiocy. I have no idea what the kids are wearing these days, but I do know you can’t go to school dressed liked a trashy stripper. In case it’s hard to read on mobile, here is a transcription of what she posted along

Earlier this week, South Carolina man, Patrick Doggett, 53, dialed 911 to complain that his girlfriend would not have sex with him. According to the police report, Doggett told the 911 operator: “My girlfriend, Ms. Faye Woodruff, won’t give me no ass.” Woodroof told Police that Doggett “had been drinking

SARASOTA, Florida — According to police, Reliford Cooper III, 26, was arrested in Manatee County after a deputy saw him speeding. The deputy attempted to pull Cooper over, but he took off, swerving into oncoming traffic, driving into two ditches. The car eventually stopped when he ran into a house.

MOULTRIE, Georgia — Jared Fournier walked into American Pawn yesterday and tried to pawn an old Sega Genesis for $700 telling the clerk it was “special” and “worth more than just a regular one.” When workers checked the console, they found a bag of crystal meth inside the game cartridge

Several great Florida Man misadventures this week. We started with the 91-year-old man who shot at landscapers for getting grass on his car. Now we have this one. Jason Tackett, 38, tried suffocating his live-in girlfriend after he caught her reading her ex-boyfriend’s obituary. The couple, who have only been

SANTA MONICA — Saffron Jones is taking a street psychic to court for making “horrible predictions” that she says changed her life forever. Jones found the street psychic, Monica Star, on Santa Monica Pier seven months ago and paid her $3 for what she thought would be a fun and positive

As we all know, Craigslist is a goldmine for insane stuff. This guy put up one of the weirdest ads of all-time. I can’t imagine he got any real responses, but you never know these days. CL ad transcript: I want a big beautiful Mexican lady here in Detroit to

Chuck’s Place, a restaurant in Thiensville, Wisconsin, got more than they bargained for when a 350 pound man, Bill Wisth, ate all their fish. Wisth ordered the bottomless fish fry on a Friday night and was given about 20 pieces of fish before finally being told they were out. Wisth

AVON PARK, Fla. — A 91-year-old man, Max Horton, has been charged with attempted murder after threatening to kill and shooting at a landscaper who apparently got lawn clippings on his his white 1987 Cadillac, according to Highlands County Sheriff’s Office arrest report. Horton yelled at the landscaper, “That’s a

LOS ANGELES, CA — A Lake Elisnore man decided it would be a good idea to wrap a 4-foot-long rattlesnake around his neck and take selfies with it. 36-year-old Alex Gomez found the poisonous snake when he was walking around a field behind his home. “I was taking it off