SACRAMENTO, California — Sheryl Anderson, 44, said she wants the State of California to send her Ken Doll to prison for domestic violence. She has owned the Ken doll for two years and claims the male Barbie doll has a severe drug and alcohol problem and frequently “scratches her” when angry. “Ken gets absolutely loaded on Bud Light and marijuana and just

LAS VEGAS — A group of hikers found an unusual discovery yesterday just outside Las Vegas: a man buried to his head in the desert. “We heard a strange howling. We walked to the sound, came over a small crest of a hill and saw this guy buried to his head,” rescuer

FRESNO, California – Jamal Jafreese is becoming a more frequent sighting in Fresno, California. He walks the streets with a ‘jive swagger,’ speaks in Ebonics and tries to make friends with black people. Jafreese recently tried to join a local chapter of The Bloods street gang, according to underground zine, The Street.

NORMAN, Oklahoma – Gene Bibles dropped out of Norman High School in 1951 because he could not stand learning. “There’s something about trying to learn stuff that is just unappealing to me,” Bibles told Saturday Magazine. “It gives me nosebleeds.” Gene also knew he never wanted to work. “I find work unpleasant,” Bibles said.

MARTIN COUNTY, Florida — Gary Linman of Hobe Sound, Florida really needed a ride home. He dialed 911 from a payphone (they sill have those?) to get that ride. —— 911 call transcript: 911: 911. What’s your emergency? Linman: This 911? 911: Yes. How may I help you? Linman: I got an emergencies. I

CHICAGO — Dang Thomas was only complaining about his hatred for pie on Facebook, but his three innocent little words cost him his job. Above: Thomas explains his firing to CAN TV Thomas, who works as a forklift operator at Horner Lumber Distributers in Chicago, arrived at work Friday morning and was surprised when he learned he had been fired by his boss,

SENOIA, GA KCT5 News reported that a Georgia man, John Paul Jones, Jr, didn’t accidently plow his truck into his house because his foot slipped off the gas pedal. He did it on purpose. “I don’t know, it was just one of those spur of the moment crazy things,” said Jones. Jones is a

MADISON, West Virginia – Witnesses told police this week that they pleaded with Boone county resident, Audrey Ranch, 62, to stop hurting her son’s pit bull, but she refused. “Eventually she bit Pedro’s acorns clean off right there in the front yard,” a witness said. “Pedro hightailed it screeching like

This is a transcribed letter that was found bobbing in a wine bottle in Lake Butler (Florida) by a snorkeler. DEAR MERMAID: I have loved you since the day I caught you fishing. I’m still sorry for making your lip bleed with the hook and hope it healed well — no scars!! But I

Moron.com:  You realize this is moron.com and readers will probably think you’re a moron, right? Unique: Yeah. Moron.com: Your name is really Unique? Unique: Yeah. Moron.com: That’s unique. Unique: Never heard that one before. Hardy har har. Moron.com: Why did you have sex with a Cabbage Patch Kid? Unique: I